6 Confessions

Morning! Well, afternoon…whatever.

You know what drives me crazy? Being inundated with blog posts about how super awesome and together and practically-perfect-in-every-way someone is…and how I can attempt to achieve their level of greatness if I simply follow their 87.573 step instructions…beginning with waking up at 3:26 every morning, eating a breakfast of quinoa and kale and running a marathon!

Here’s the thing:

A) I have no desire to do that.

2) No one is really as super-awesome 24/7 as those types of posts imply. NO ONE! With the possible exception of Mary Poppins, but I’m thinking maybe she puts something in those spoonfulls of sugar she hands out (and likely consumes, as well…just sayin’). 😉 

Anyhoo…today I decided that maybe we could all use a dose of reality. A bit of good old-fashioned telling it like it is. I’ll start.

• I manage to wrangle my kids into bathing and washing their hair an average of once a week.
• Which is also about as often as I actually brush all the tangles out of their hair.
• I lie to Smiles, who has just started wearing pull-ups, and tell her there are no potties except at our house. I’m just not ready for the whole annoying helping a kid use a public toilet thing. Potty training be darned.
• I don’t have any clocks in our house except one in the shape of a moose. (It’s super cute! But it has no numbers and even I can barely I can’t even read it.) That way I can tell the kids it’s bedtime whenever I get so exhausted that I just can’t handle them being awake a second longer. Even if it’s only 7:00.
• I pawned off the assisting of Boo’s science experiments on Artist this year because I don’t have the energy to both oversee the experiments and keep Smiles from destroying them.
• Artist and Boo wake up before me every morning and help themselves to granola bars, watch TV or play Wii, and otherwise gallivant about for an hour or 2 until I get up.

So, yeah. That’s a smidgen of a glimpse into my real life these days. You can now feel much better about yourself. You’re welcome. 🙂

Now I need to eat some lunch…and see how much of a mess my littles made with the jar of peanut butter and container of hummus I let them have so they could feed themselves while I wrote this post. And then I’ll drink a few cups of coffee to help me muster up the energy to actually clean up that mess…and then clean up all the messes they make while I’m cleaning up that mess, and so on. 😉